He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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