Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
