We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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