I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
