if you like me you must not know who I am
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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