so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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