So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
time to smoke my breakfast
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
