she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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