So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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