i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize