trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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