yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
