bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
