just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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