so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
