she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize