carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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