Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Randomize
