this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
you never un-have a 4some
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
