i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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