Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize