I cockslap morals
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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