Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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