I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
