i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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