Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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