How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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