I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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