let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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