So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize