Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
i believe in u and ur pee
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
