drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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