can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
