don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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