dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
