I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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