Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
