do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
