so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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