There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
