Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
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