Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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