Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
