People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
time to smoke my breakfast
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
