..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
her facebook's as public as her vagina
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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