bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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