I hate your face
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
