if only i could text you this smell
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
