But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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