Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
