what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
