i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
